vulture.com 
Which Barbie Would Oppenheimer Be?
One of the major themes of the summer’s biggest release, Barbie, is that little girls see themselves in Barbie dolls and it teaches them they can be anything they want to be. Meanwhile, one of the major themes of Oppenheimer is that men are talking in the 1940s. But why should these men be denied the chance at Barbie representation just because they were born before Barbie existed and because they are men? Honestly, it’s problematic.
Because we at Vulture are do-gooders, we thought we should remedy the situation and allow the cast of Oppenheimer the same chance that little girls across the world have been given — the opportunity to identify with Barbies. (Or at least, with characters from the Barbie movie.) They’re welcome.
Oppenheimer is Ruth Handler
Photo-Illustration: Vulture. Photos: Universal; Warner Bros.
Benny Safdie as Edward Teller has a spookiness to him that aligns him with Weird Barbie (Kate McKinnon). Weird Barbie is an inventor; she’s built a full-scale model of Barbie Land, has knowledge about the real world and the nature of everyone’s Barbxistence, and devises plans to repair rifts between universes. She’s also an outcast, not entirely accepted by mainstream Barbie society. Teller, likewise, is often the odd man out — his Hungarian accent sets him apart in the paranoid environs of this American military project. He’s also the only one at the Manhattan Project who favors a fusion-type weapon over the fission-based one they ultimately made, and when he’s not dreaming up the hydrogen bomb, he’s butting heads with Oppenheimer over the security restrictions scientists in Los Alamos are placed under. Plus Weird Barbie has crayon scribbles all over her face and Teller is always very shiny thanks to some sort of atomic-bomb-proof sunscreen.
There is only one Allan
There is only one Allan, but if an Allan escaped into our world, and if instead of joining *NSYNC he fell in with the Manhattan Project (which was in many ways a band of boys, almost like a kind of … boy band), he’d be the one to push the button, a.k.a. Kenneth Bainbridge (Josh Peck). Some dolls just want to watch the world burn.
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